Jokers Wild

…From David in Thorpe Willoughby (UK)

Received from a friend who is in the property insurance business. It is well worth reading.

This is one of those e-mails that if you don’t send it, rest assured someone on your list will suffer for not reading it. The original message was written by a lady whose brother and wife learned a hard lesson this past week.

Their house burnt down.. nothing left but ashes. They have good insurance so the house will be replaced and most of the contents.. That is the good news.

However, they were sick when they found out the cause of the fire.. The insurance investigator sifted through the ashes for several hours. He had the cause of the fire traced to the master bathroom. He asked her sist er-in-law what she had plugged in the bathroom. She listed the normal things….curling iron, blow dryer.
He kept saying to her, ‘No, this would be something that would disintegrate at high temperatures’. Then her sister-in-law remembered she had a Glade Plug-In, in the bathroom.

The investigator had one of those ‘Aha’ moments. He said that was the cause of the fire.
He said he has seen more house fires started with the plug-in type room fresheners than anything else.
He said the plastic they are made from is THIN.
He also said that in every case there was nothing left to prove that it even existed.
When the investigator looked in the wall plug, the two prongs left from the plug-in were still in there.

Her sister-in-law had one of the plug-ins that had a small night light built in it.
She said she had noticed that the light would dim and then finally go out.
She would walk in to the bathroom a few hours later, and the light would be back on again.
The investigator said that the unit was getting too hot, and would dim and go out rather than just blow the light bulb. Once it cooled down it would come back on.
That is a warning sign.

The investigator said he personally wouldn’t have any type of plug in fragrance device anywhere in his house. He has seen too many places that have been burned down due to them.

This photo was taken at the scene of a house fire that occurred 2/3/2008

We’ve been experiencing a bit of weather around here of late.

When the winds and neep tides are in collision, the effects can be quite dramatic.
Property by the sea and Dunbar Harbour (and the boats therein) can suffer.

To see what I mean,  click HERE

And here’s a short film taken by the harbour in North Berwick. The harbour is to the left and the ‘ safe and dry’ dinghy storage area is to the right. The boats being pushed up against the wall would have been on trailers or stored inverted on the ground before the flood hit.

Take a look HERE

You’ve Got To Be Kidding….

Children with wacky parents get a raw deal at the best of times but for one little girl from New Zealand, the joke’s gone too far.
Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii is divorcing her parents so she can change her terrible name.
The nine-year-old was made a ward of court in the North Island’s New Plymouth this week.
But the girl, TDTHFH for short, isn’t the only one child with a mad moniker.
Here we have an A-Z of some of the most embarrassing, unpronounceable or just plain weird names from round the world.

A – A Chinese couple named their son @ which in Chinese is pronounced ‘ai ta’ meaning ‘love him’.

B – Swedish courts can also reject unusual names. In 1991 a Swedish couple tried to name their child Brfxxccxxmnpcccclllmmnprxvclmnckssqlbb11116 (pronounced ‘Albin’) in protest.
The court rejected the name and fined them £450.

C – Brazilian footballer Creedence Clearwater Couto was named after legendary American rock band Creed.

D – In 1995, US hit The Late Show made a celebrity of Canadian petrol station owner Dick Assman.

E – Two sports-loving dads in Texas and Michigan named their sons ESPN (pronounced ‘Espin’) after the US TV channel.

F – Names often change their meanings over the years. At least we hope so for the sake of poor F*ck K Holmwood who was born in Sussex in1878. His mother was named Fanny.

G – In 2005 an online casino paid Terri Iligan £8,000 to change her name to GoldenPalaceDotCom.

H – Paula Yates and Michael Hutchence named their daughter Heavenly Hiraani Tiger Lily.

I – Sometimes it’s the surname that causes the trouble. James Hogg, a former Governor of Texas named his daughter Ima.

J – Bond fan David Fearn from Walsall changed his name to James Dr No From Russia with Love Goldfinger Thunderball You Only Live Twice On Her Majesty’s Secret Service Diamonds Are Forever Live and Let Die The Man with the Golden Gun The Spy Who Loved Me Moonraker For Your Eyes Only Octopussy A View to a Kill The Living Daylights Licence to Kill Golden Eye Tomorrow Never Dies The World Is Not Enough Die Another Day Casino Royale Bond, to celebrate the release of the latest 007 film in 2006.

K – Comic book fan Nicolas Cage named his son Kal-El, Superman’s real name.

L – Mia Farrow named her daughter Lark Song. She also has children named Summer Song and Satchel.

M – Parents having trouble choosing baby names often look to Hollywood for inspiration.
In 2003, several hundred boys were named Maximus, after Russell Crowe’s character in the film Gladiator.

N – Number 16 Bus Shelter was one of the names that the New Zealand courts didn’t reject.

O – Actress Ocean Hellman’s full name is actually Crystal Ocean Supri Heavenly Blue Sky Hellman.

P -Peaches Geldof’s full name is Peaches Honeyblossom Michelle Charlotte Angel Vanessa Geldof. Her sisters are named Fifi Trixibelle and Little Pixie.

Q – Queer Mansell, who lived in South Carolina in the 1930s, had a husband named Pink.

R – American actor Robert Trebor’s name is a palindrome – it reads the same when spelled backwards.

S – Bill and Moya Lear, owners of posh private jet firm Lear, named their daughter Shanda.

T – Sometimes the parents aren’t to blame. In 1994, 17-year-old Peter Eastman changed his name to Trout Fishing In America, the title of his favourite book.

U – It sounds like the title of a horror movie but in fact Urban Shocker was a baseball player in the 1920s.

V – American actress Robin Strasser was given the middle names Victory In Europe becase she was born on VE-Day, May 7, 1945.

W – Baseball player Wonderful Terrific Monds the Third was named after his father and grandfather who got the name because his parents were so pleased to have had a son.

X – TV shows can inspire parents: in 1996 and 1997, 567 girls were named after Xena: Warrior Princess, played by Lucy Lawless.

Y – Michael Howard of Leeds had his name legally changed to Yorkshire Bank PLC Are Fascist B*stards after being charged £20 for a £10 overdraft. He closed his account and asked for a cheque with the balance to be made out in his new name.

Z – Zachary Zzzzzzzzzra was born Bill Holland but the decorator changed his name so people would always be able to find him at the back of the phonebook.

…From Baz – Somewhere in the South China Seas

A man had two of the best tickets for the FA Cup Final. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him.

“No”, he says, “the seat is empty.”

“This is incredible!” said the man, “who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the FA Cup Final, the biggest sporting event of the year, and not use it?”

He says, “Well, actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Cup Final we haven’t been to together since we got married.”

“Oh… I’m sorry to hear that. That’s terrible. I guess you couldn’t find someone else, a friend or relative or even a neighbour to take the seat?”

The man shakes his head… “No. They’re all at the funeral.”